'heima'

After many months of being away from home, i am finally going back for a brief visit! There is something so refreshing about home that one can only understand and experience after being apart from it for an extended period of time. I am looking forward to the drive home. It gives me time to listen to music, to think about all of lifes issues, and to really focus on God. It gives me plenty of time to be alone and to spend that time or at least a good portion of that time in prayer. Its such a weird feeling knowing that im leaving people i love to go home to people i love. I wish i could always have all the people i love close to me.

I think fall has to be my favorite time of the year. I have so many amazing memories from this time of year through out my life. Also the fact that its almost Thanksgiving is so wonderful! I have so much to be thankful for; whether its Salvation, or family, or having food to eat, or Kasey. God has truly blessed me with so much. His blessings have surpassed anything that i could ever imagine asking for! Being 'heima' (Icelandic for 'at home') is such a blessing. Im really excited to see my parents and my brother... and even the cat!

Once iv spent my short few days at home, the family and I will head down to Texas to stay with our cousins for about a week. Man, i love those gals! They all have such a heart for the Lord! I only get to see them about once a year, but each time we meet up, its as if we havent spent a day apart. Their home is so inviting, the weather during this time there is beautiful, our conversations are always full of joy, and its such a blessing to be able to spend time with them. I wish i could share who they are with everyone. They are amazing in and out.

So, off i am to bed to get a good nights rest for the drive tomorrow. Hopefully the trip goes well with no problems and it will be a time that is encompassed by God's grace and glory.

Von.. er ágætis byrjun

Music = Mood.

Music is such a huge part of my life. I have tons of memories from different bands, and types of music i have listened to through out my life. It has shaped much of who i am. I have realized, though, as im sure many people have noticed, that music has the biggest impact on ones mood. I'll listen to sad music when im sad, happy music when im happy, hard music when im angry, ect. It works the opposite way too. I can be in a good mood and listen to a sad song and it will change my mood. Sometimes im in a very weird mood and i have to find the music for the mood im in. Usually its interpol that i listen to in my weird mood. As i type, im listening to Psapp, they seem to fit the mood perfectly.

I dont know why my mood is so influenced by music. Example: One day, near the end of a week, i was in a really weird mood, i couldnt figure out why, i was frustrated and upset. I had been listening to Pedro the Lion, and other similar bands basically the entire week. I put in some Zao and it completely changed my mood to perky and happy! It had a really big impact on me. Its almost like i need a musical balance during the week to keep me on level ground.

Another great impact is the spiritual value of the music. I try to listen to all, or mostly christian music that has great spiritual values and lyrics. Some people dont understand some of the music that has great spiritual value to me; such as Zao.

Most of the time, though, when i listen to music, i dont just "listen" to it. I like to experience music. I like to take it all in, lyrics, sound, feeling, everything. The band that has the most influence on the way i feel, is Sigur Rós. I dont like just putting them on and just having them play as background music. I need to listen to them either alone, or with someone that wants to experience them along with me. Its almost impossible to explain the way they make me feel. I guess looking at pictuers of Iceland would be a good way to sum it up!

I think there may be only one other person who really understands me when it comes to how much a music is apart of their lives. That person would be my older brother. The last time Cage and i were together, i hopped in the car with him, and for the first half hour or so, we didnt say a word, we shard music instead! That was our way of showing each other what our lives had been like, how things were going, and how things were changing. It was really amazing! I cant wait to hang out with him again, to share whats going on in our lives through music.

Conquering the World! (sort of..)

Do you ever wake up in the morning with the thought in your head, "I really want to be productive and get lots of things done today!" You lay there and think about all the things that you want to accomplish and conquer. Everything in your head just works out perfectly the entire day, you get everything done, and all is as planned. But then.. you step out of bed onto the floor and all those thoughts some how get glued to the pillow. Thats what happens in many of my days. Its like all those thoughts just vanish the instant i stand up. The day doesnt go how i imagined it, nothing works out, everything i wanted to get done stays untouched, and when i go to bed at night everything that i originally planed in the beginning crawls back into my head and i remember what i was supposed to do. Okay, i admit im a bit of a procrastinator, but that doesnt mean im not purposely trying not to get something done. It seems like the day just flies by and then im out of time to do the things i wanted to do. That may also have to do with the fact that im much more of a night person than a morning person, just ask my family about that one, or try and visit me in the morning and you'll see what im talking about.

Im at a stage in life where im trying to figure out what the best thing for me to be doing would be. I have so many ideas and things that id like to do that im not sure what to do first. This could be the source of the problem. I want to travel, i want to play and create music, i want to build up a business, i want to help my brother-in-law with his ideas and projects, i want to get married, i want to serve others, i want to serve God, i want to be unbound to a place of work where i can be free to work when i want and how i want. There is so much that i would like for my life that i dont know what exactly to do! The things that i am doing, i like very much, and i am so thankful for. I guess the problem is that i just dont know what step to take next. That seems to be how God works though. He shows me just enough to set my foot down, but he doesnt show me the entire road. I think that allows me to be so much more dependent on Him than anyone or anything else. He knows whats best for me, so it would be the best idea to let Him do the leading in my life.

Im so thankful to those around me who are huge encouragements, and who help me with the things that i face day to day. Im going to work hard at getting things done. Thats actually a, sort of, motto for me lately. "It wont get done if nobody does it, so why dont i do it?" and "Do hard things." Both of those are motivation for me to actually work hard to get stuff done. I try to encourage others around me to do the same. Its really cool and inspirational to see motivated people in action. I hope that when people look at me, they see someone who is working hard to achieve the goals iv set, as well as someone who is focused on the Lord.

I hope that when i wake up tomorrow, that all the things that i would like to accomplish through out the day, stay in my head. I hope that when i place my feet on the floor, that i'll be constantly moving, getting things done. And i hope that i can encourage others to do the same.